Do you think people who disrespect you unprovoked can not make recourse to your behaviour when?

you are disresepctful in return to lessen what they did? I mean if they have put you down quite a few times and when you put them down it is proof of what sort of person you are? It is like prodding a person with a stick and when you prod back they are surprised, shocked, blame you, use it as evidence for what sort of person you are? And when you tell them this ogy about the 'prodding stick' to explain their behaviour they say 'that makes no sense'